Learning to let go

5/11/2007
There are only a few people in this world I consider my best friends, which includes, of course, Wolf Bear. Let me just say I am extremely fortunate to enjoy the friends I do share my life with, but it is sad when there comes a point in one of these friendships when you realize you’ve come to a fork in the road.

I’m one of those individuals who has a few extremely close friends I keep for life. I can count on one hand those who I consider family. My friends would do anything for me, and in return, I would do the same for them. We are always there for one another no matter how many days, months, or even years have passed. They do not judge, they do not criticize, they love unconditionally.

But this post is about one friend in particular. We met when our children were newborns while at a local playgroup, and became instant buddies. It was as if, excuse the cliche, we’d known each other our entire lives. She got me, I got her, life was good. Over the years, our friendship grew, and we would speak by phone several times a day, and spent mornings at the local coffee shop with our kids, and generally did what women do.

Then one day, she told me she was moving. It was a shock and surprise to me especially since it happened almost overnight. Okay, so maybe not overnight, but pretty darn close! I remember thinking to myself she was making an irrational decision; however, I supported her. She said she needed a bigger house because they wanted another child.

I immediately became fearful I was going to lose her. Not only would our geographical distance increase (she was only a 15 minute walk away from me), but our kinship would also undergo some sort of alteration. Of course, she could tell I was stressing, so was she. We comforted each other and promised ourselves nothing would change.

Fast forward one year. We kept our promise, and still communicated frequently by e-mail and phone.

Fast forward another year, and there’s now a void in my heart. While time changes everyone, I never thought it would affect us. It makes me sad to think this could be the end of our friendship. She has her second child, a larger home, and a very busy life. But this wasn’t the straw that broke the camel’s back (sorry, another trite expression). What did it was when she said she was going to do something (important) and she didn’t. After going through this up-and-down with her for several years, I arrived at the realization that we are at that fork in the road. I’ve gone in one direction, and she’s taken another. I’m just sorry not to be on the same path with her.

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